There are times when you feel the loneliest. The darkest hours in which you struggle to overcome the sadness around you but it fills you like it has the ultimate right to do so. You feel unbearable pain in your heart and your eyes fails to stop the tears flowing. All the sorrows and failures that you’ve faced comes as a reminder in your mind. You try to forget but you can’t. You try to distract yourself but your mind is pre-occupied to help you with it. I believe that these are the worst fights a person faces knowing that he’ll eventually lose. These are the fights with one’s own past which is not amendable.
You hope for someone to come and save you but your hopes are drowned as no one understands the things you are feeling. You want to be protected but no one protects you. It’s only you left with the unmitigated pain. The aid you require never arrives leaving you to be your own aid.
You pray for it to end soon but somewhere deep inside it stays with you all the time. The comfort you look for is unreachable until you start getting comfortable with your sorrows. I don’t really have an answer of how to get rid of this feeling but the best resort I’ve found is praying.
There is no one else who knows your story as well as the God does. No one knows your agony except the one and only. Talking to him and sharing with him is the only way I have found to comfort my heart. The pain doesn’t end but it becomes tolerable. The peace I have found by praying during those hours have become my strength to deal with the worst hours.